Let's be friends

How many "friends" do you have? Two years ago, this question would have made me ponder my relationships and those who are important in my life. In response, I might write a letter to an old friend or make a phone call. It would have caused me to examine the people with whom I spend most of my time. Thanks to facebook, this contemplation is irrelevant. How many "friends" do I have? 244, though I have some requests out.

Do you "like" me? I remember this loaded question from middle school romance. The responses I often heard were, "I like you, but I don't like you like you." or "I like you, like a friend or a brother." "Like" has become a click and a thumbs up. People, product, television programs, churches, causes, fads and movements compete for our "likes", our thumbs. Even this blog has a facebook fan page (hint, hint). How many likes does one need to be significant? Relevant? Successful? Winning?

Social networking has done more than hijack word meanings. Our yearly celebrations of life, formally spent surrounded by family and friends, are now spent by the glow of a computer screen: counting our two word birthday wishes and "defriending" those who have forgotten. Maybe I am exaggerating. My point is, where we have gained in the number of "friends", we have lost the depth of friendship.

One would think that, in culture driven by text based communication through e-mail, phone messaging, facebook and twitter, our writing would become more expressive. To keep from being misunderstood, we would recapture the lost arts of creative composition and critical thinking, but in a society where fast food is the daily diet, nothing could be further from the truth. Welcome to the cut and paste, point and click world of tomorrow. Here our phones, not our spouse or closest friends, finish our sentences. Since we speak in abbreviation, conversation is abbreviated.

Thank you technology for making my relationships less complicated and meaningful. Now I finally have more time to spend with my DVR.

Remember mail? Not junk mail, but postcards, birthday cards, letters - mail. It used to be a big deal. Someone cared enough to write something out, place it in an envelope, buy a stamp and walk to the end of their driveway for you. There is value in that labor. It doesn't mean that an e-mail or computer message is meaningless, but I can send at least twenty in the next hour without moving from my seat while listening to my iPod, reading a book on my Kindle and playing a game on my phone - and it doesn't cost me 44 cents a message (though I did have to google the price of postage).

When was the last time you wrote a letter? No, not a single character of the alphabet. You know, a pen to page, multi-paragraph, starting with "dear" ending with "love" letter. Do it. Get some stationary (do they even sell this anymore?) or notebook paper. Find a pen. Write. Start with a postcard if you must - only 29 cents (found this when I was looking for the regular price of postage). Sure you could call, but this is your chance to express yourself to someone in an uninterrupted, personal way.

Reconnect. Be a friend . . . if you know what I mean. Don't forget to comment or click like if you have enjoyed this blog! Just kidding. No, seriously, click like, up near the top of the blog on the right . . . or send mail, with cash - no wait, gift cards. Never send cash in the mail.